Too Close For Comfort

Today I find myself still somewhat reeling with shock and awe. Although I know our world is filled with wickedness I somehow try to maintain optimism that it will never strike too close to home. I am occasionally caught in unfortunate dilemmas requiring me to step back and reevaluate a circumstance, but this past weekend I found myself touched to the core and am still struggling to make sense of the situation.

I don’t think murder ever really makes sense. Sometimes, maybe, as retribution for horrendous acts against a child, I can get my brain around what would drive a person to this heinous act. But as an act of spite, or vengeance against another adult for a breakup, or a horrible divorce, adultery, theft; I just don’t get it. Even as I type I am sitting in an attorneys office as moral support to a friend who is in divorce mediation. Although I have been angry at her soon to be ex-spouse, and I know she has been too, I can’t imagine a reason to actually kill him. He is, after all, the father of her children and no matter how ugly they might be/have been to each other he doesn’t deserve physical punishment.

So this past weekend when I learned of a murder/suicide in Knoxville I was a bit surprised. We do have hardcore violence occasionally here, but it is rare I hear about it. I don’t read the paper regularly and tend to forgo the nightly news for children’s activities and family time. So the simple fact that I am aware of this incident makes it remarkable in my mind.

A vibrant young woman, who was a single mother, was shot and killed outside her home last Friday after returning from dropping her child off at school. The shooter then turned the gun on himself and took his own life. The two had a history, some of it publicized in the news media, spanning a number of years. Although I cannot speak to the validity of the reports the relationship had supposedly been tumultuous and terminated at some point.

This woman happened to be the mother of one of First Born’s friends, peers, and classmate. My brain reels to grasp what would push someone to this point. To kill the mother of a young child, leaving her world turned upside down, to me would require some sort of delirium, or insanity beyond my comprehension. The act in and of itself so violent it turns my stomach, and the thought of this child leaves me unable to breathe, suffocating in my sorrow for her.

There are many things I feel shouldn’t ever have to happen in a persons life. No one should have to explain to their second grader that their friend’s mother has been killed. And certainly no one should ever have to tell a second grade girl her mother is forever gone, torn from her life, by some undeserved act of violence. This incident, unfortunately, is not one I was able to keep at arms length.

Heavenly Father,

I pray for this extended family, that they have the strength and sanity to guide this child through the excruciating days ahead. I pray they have the gifts of guidance to steer her as she navigates her life without her mother. I pray for this child, that someday she receives the peace that surpasses all understanding, knowing she is safe in Your hand and that in spite of the immediate pain, all things work to some greater good (although at this point, any reason completely escapes me). I pray she is surrounded by loving hearts, caring hands, and all the warmth You can provide.

In Jesus sweet, sweet name.
Amen