Hiatus

I have been on hiatus. Not only a blog hiatus, but a hiatus from a plethora of activities I normally partake. The past few weeks I have chucked all sense of self-discipline and productivity out the window, likely to the point of being self-destructive; and if not self-destructive most certainly not PRODUCTIVE!

The spectrum of things I have been hiating (yeah, I just made that a word) is broad. I haven’t been:

• Blogging (which means tons and tons of “stuff” beating around in my head),
• House cleaning (even with a every other week housekeeper I have maintenance I should take care of)
• Cooking (even though my Hero does lot’s, I haven’t done any)
• Laundry (yep, Hero caught that all up this weekend too)
• Eating properly (that healthy diet was chucked out the window because I love Marble Slab and Banana Pudding Milkshakes)
• Exercising (none…for over two weeks)
• Reading
• Daily Bible reading
• Daily prayer time (yeah, I have forgone the dedicated prayer time…occasional chats have occurred)
• De-cluttering (it’s been more like RE-cluttering)
• Sleeping properly
• Fully engaging with my children as often as I should
• Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera

What have I been doing? That really is a good question, because as I look back over the past few weeks I kinda come up empty handed.

I did have the joy of spending time with a dear friend who has been part of my life for twenty-one years. That is mega special…maybe more on that later.

I have eaten crappy food, and lots of it. I have surfed the internet till I am cross-eyed and glazed over. I have played with my new BlackBerry Tour. Hmm, that’s about it. I have wasted hours and hours of time.

I don’t feel good about this wasted time. I am depressed and cranky, physically challenged, and emotionally drained. I have not served my spouse, my children, my friends or myself very well. And now I have to find the self-discipline to get back on track…ugh, why is it so easy to slack on a habit and lose the desire in a day and it takes twenty one days to build that habit back up? My brain is silently screaming “WHAT HAVE I DONE?”

Father God, thank you for loving me in spite of my shortcomings, my struggles, my stubbornness.

Today I pray for self-discipline to accomplish the things You desire for me. I pray restored passion for the things I love in life. I pray for this depression to be lifted and my happy spirit to be renewed and re-established. I pray for normal sleep patterns and sound night’s rest. I pray for will power, strength, patience and wisdom. You have called me to grow and I pray I put myself in the narrow path You have set before me.

I also pray for all who may read this post that they too may find strength and restoration in You, especially during the hectic times when worldly cares so easily take over and take hold. I claim peace for their lives, hedges of protection around them and their families, and blessings to rain down from Heaven.

In Jesus sweet, sweet name.

Amen